Someone had a bit too much grog

On a warm July night, PNC Park hosted more action in the stands than on the field as the Pirates most likely produced another subpar outing and two West Virginia basketball players were detained by the popo for their drunken misbehavior. On Tuesday, the pair of Joe Mazzulla and Cam Thoroughman owned up to their actions, pleading guilty to disorderly conduct and public intoxication and were fined $100 each. Good thing the NCAA allows athletes to work minimum wage jobs because otherwise I don’t know how they (or maybe which alumni) would pay the fine.

Mazzulla, who was originally charged with aggravated assault, hindering an arrest and underage drinking and Thoroughman, who was charged with disorderly conduct, resisting arrest and underage drinking were graciously granted the opportunity to plead to a lesser charge, which they did. It is unknown how the University plans to deal with this latest stain, but it is said it will be “handled internally”

What exactly does that mean? Do they run more laps? Do they actually have to attend class and maybe write a paper? Do they have to teach little children to play basketball at 7 on a Saturday morning? Or they just get yelled at, thrown their practice jerseys and take the court? I’m going with the latter.

Watch out Joe and Cam, because the popo are on your tail!
(Photo: Metro News; Source)

The Paddywagon

Giants player top today's headlines:

Danny Ware proves why you should never drink and walk? [Fannation via ProFootballTalk]

Plaxico Burress may have more headaches off the field than on [North Jersey]

Fantasy football is geting too dangerous [Naple News via Busted Coverage]

Note to those with restraining orders, phone calls do count [ESPN]

There's a reason why people don't wear Fresno State gear [Sports by Brooks]

You can always count on John Daly to make you feel better about yourself [Fannation]

Weekend Round-Up

As you know, I’ve been on vacation for the past couple of days, and as I return back to the wonderful worldwide web, I found a couple of great stories that are a few days old, but frankly too funny (as in you’re a complete moron haha kind of way) not to comment on.

Several Oregon football players were involved in a speed-racing related crash early Thursday, sending two players to the hospital. Freshman QB Darron Thomas and sophomore receiver Jamere Holland were passengers in the Ford Mustang while teammate Eddie Pleasant was at the helm when the incident happened. Thomas was said to have suffered only a bruised elbow and could have been available to play in Oregon’s Saturday game while Pleasant and Holland were taken to a local hospital. Pleasant needed 75 stitches to close a 1-inch gash, but that wasn’t the worst part of the accident, he also was charged with reckless driving and speed racing. Watch out boys, because the popo are on your tail!
(source)

Meanwhile USC will have to fill the place of recruit Maurice Simmons after he was sentenced to four years in jail for felony robbery, assault with a firearm and the misdemeanor of allowing someone to bring a gun into his car. A probation office had asked the court to sentence Simmons to probation, but the court thought felony robbery was a bit too serious of a crime to let him walk, even though he had a football scholarship. Too bad, the kid had an opportunity to make something of himself and he let it get away. Watch out Maurice, because the popo are on your tail!
(source)

And finally, the Bluegrass Beat is reporting that Kentucky football player Ashton Cobb was arrested on Friday and was absent from the Wildcat’s game against Western Kentucky on Saturday. Apparently Cobb suffers from the Kelvin Sampson disease of calling and texting people excessively, like about 19 times too many. Cobb’s ex-girlfriend wasn’t a huge fan of the threatening voice messages he was leaving her and relayed them to the local authorities who in turn arrested his ass. Next time, just text something nasty to the campus gossip blog ala Blair Waldrof, otherwise Ashton, you’ll have the popo on your tail!
(source)

Look who is out of jail

Besides the fact that the Mets choked for the second straight season, the highlight of Sunday’s festivities for me had to be that Dwight Gooden citing. As I sat on my couch watching Keith Hernandez, Ron Darling and Gary Cohen interviewing Darryl Strawberry during a rain delay, I began to wonder if Doc was out of the pen. You see, Dwight was locked up during the 2006 celebration of the 1986 team and was unable to attend the game. However, it seems Gooden is free man now. For how long, who knows, but as of 10: 45 this morning he’s yet to be sent back to prison.
(Photo: AP)

Just when I was getting started...

...I go on vacation. While I may be on holiday, the popo are not, so stay on the straight and narrow, or I'll be blogging about you on Monday!

The Paddywagon

Fasten your spleens, here are today’s links:

Tough times for USC’s Shareece Wright. First he’s arrested at a going away party and now he’s out with a hairline fracture in one of his vertebrae [ESPN]

Out of the line-up since September 6th, Penn State's stoners are allowed to practice [Fannation]

Busted Coverage gives a round-up of arrests from this weekend including a story about the Raiders-Bills Game [WVIB]

See, now this is what happens when you’re named in the Mitchell Report, deny your involvement and then sue everyone in sight. You stop getting invited to things. [Deadspin]

Self-defense? How big was this cat? [The Daily News]

It’s prison day for Tim Donaghy [ESPN]

Somebody robbed Dylan's. What the frak? Is nothing sacred anymore? [The Daily News via CityFile]

Sticky Finger Sallys get arrested

Remember last week when I reminded everyone to hold off on taking any mementos from Yankee Stadium? Holding of taking any signs, pieces of the outfield wall (although some of the White Sox didn’t heed that warning as seen in this picture), a seat or two, a bench from the bleachers a monument from Monument Park. I warned you guys. And still more than a dozen of you did not take it to heart and instead paid a visit to the local jail for stealing pieces of Yankee Stadium. That’s right; possession of stolen property is not a pretty tidbit to add to your resume.

So for all those fans heading to Shea this week in what could be the final week of Shea Stadium, if the Mets continue on their disastrous course, bring home a program or a souvenir cup, but leave everything else in the stadium or the popo will be on your tail!
(source)